5. Use a Sex Toy
Of course, your fingers can be a great addition, but taking things up one notch further with a sex toy can really blow your partner’s mind, since it can do things your fingers, well, can’t.
Whether it’s a dildo, a smaller vibrator or a toy that combines both attributes, penetrating your partner with it while you go down on them can result in a blended orgasm, where you’re making them climax from G-spot and clitoral stimulation simultaneously.
“You may opt to press a vibrating toy directly against your lover while you down on them (e.g. press the tip over the head of the clitoris while you lick down below),” says O’Reilly, “or you might press a flat vibrating toy against your cheek or throat so they can enjoy the rumbly vibrations via your lips and tongue.”
6. Put on Some Music
If you struggle to remain interested or focused while going down on your partner, one good tip is to listen to some music.
Not only does that have the side-benefit of covering up any noises your partner’s making (and potentially setting the mood, if you’re playing sexy songs), having a song on can give you a rhythm to match your tongue strokes to.
7. Make It a Conversation
Whatever you do, don’t just bury your head in your partner’s crotch, go at it and hope for the best.
Like anything sexual, getting good at cunnilingus is about a strong dynamic between the people involved, and you don’t get there by accident.
“When in doubt, ask,” says Lords. “The way to give your partner the best oral sex they’ve ever had is to find out what they enjoy most. Many, many people will want more clitoral action than they’re getting, so that’s a good start.”
“But,” she notes, you should “find out if slow and sensual works best or if they like something rougher, harder, or faster. And then give them what they want.”
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Products to Boost Your Cunnilingus Experience
In its natural state, all cunnilingus really requires is two bodies and some saliva. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be augmented with some outside help – or that you shouldn’t invest in it. Here are five things you can spend a little on if you’re looking to amp up your oral sex.
1. Vibrator
By and large, most straight guys don’t have a ton of vibrator experience – especially not compared to their female counterparts. But if that’s you, you’re missing out. It might seem a little bit weird to bring a toy into bed with you if you’re worried that it can pleasure your partner better than you can, but if you can push through that initial macho discomfort, you’re in for a world of orgasms. The JimmyJane Intro 6, for instance, packs three different power levels, three vibration modes and is both washable and bath-safe.
2. Dildo
Of course, lots of vibrators are primarily for stimulating the clitoris, and it’s possible that with your mouth already doing just that, your partner would prefer something non-vibrating to penetrate her vagina. If that’s the case, you can opt instead for a dildo – a penis-like toy that makes up for in size what it’s lacking in vibration capacity. The Njoy Pure Wand stainless steel dildo isn’t exactly penis-shaped, but its curved appearance means more G-spot pleasure, and the steel construction means it’s both solid and durable.
3. OMGYES
This isn’t a product per se, but damn if it won’t help your oral sex game. OMGYES is a site founded specifically to help men become experts in female pleasure, and though it’s not free, the investment is worth it if becoming a sex god is on your to-do list. And it’s not just a boring collection of how-to articles; the site helps you learn with interactive teaching tools that don’t hold anything back.
