- It takes longer to communicate through text (many people type more slowly than they speak).
- People are more preoccupied with how they word things when communicating through text than when communicating verbally.
- Answers require more explanation and thought when communicated through text than in person with accompanying physical cues.
One woman speculated that she probably would not have felt so pressured by the time limit if she had chatted with her partner in person because their facial cues would have made up for short or incomplete answers. She found herself worrying over whether her partner found her answers too short or her transitions between topics too abrupt or rude.
She found it easier to give people more credit for their pauses and unfinished thoughts when you can see their facial expressions than when you’re sitting there waiting for their next typed-out response.
Results from our follow-up questionnaire
We sent out a questionnaire to the participants one week later to see if anyone had followed up with their partners after the study (27 people got back to us).
We asked them if they had talked to their partner since the day of the study, if they had done something with them in person, and if they planned on maintaining communication with them moving forward.
While about half of the participants (48%) had a conversation with their partner in the week after the study, and about a quarter (25%) had more than one conversation, the majority of participants did not intend to see their partner again in the future (78%).
One person admitted to simply being �too lazy� to bother keeping in contact. Most participants said that they would consider using the questions again but in person, or that they would consider pulling some of the questions and using them as ice breakers, rather than going through the entire set of 36 questions.
But it wasn’t all for nothing. When we followed up with one of the participants, she had this to say:
What can we take away from these online dating statistics?
So our results show that text-only conversation actually acts as a barrier when attempting to reach accelerated closeness, despite making it easier for more reserved people to discuss personal topics.
Multiple participants noted in their post-conversation questionnaires that physical attraction is an important aspect of their romantic relationships. A person’s facial expressions can reveal things about them that text can’t.
If we had asked participants to even just show a photo of themselves to their partner, the conversations and responses would probably have been different.
Meeting in person still matters to most people
W hile online dating services are an effective way for people to get in touch with potential matches, in order for relationships to progress to something more, most people still require face-to-face interaction.
That being said, participants told me that they appreciate the sort of screening process of chatting online before deciding to meet someone in person.
After the study, one man told me that his longest lasting relationships in the past involved a longer period of texting before they actually met in person.
More couples are meeting online each year
A 2017 study by The Knot found that 19% of brides met their spouses through online dating. T his is compared to a 2010 Match survey which reported that 17% of couples met online.
Those numbers are projected to grow�according to research done by eHarmony , 38% of couples are expected to meet online in the near future, with that number rising to 70% of couples by 2040.